Monday, 15 January 2007
By Sabria S Jawhar
The Saudi Gazette
Today US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice arrives in Saudi Arabia to talk to King Abdullah about George Bush’s “surge” strategy in Iraq and beat the dead horse known as the Israeli-Palestinian disaster. She will have no fresh proposals for peace between Israel and the Palestinians and nothing new under the sun for Iraq. Just more Americans to serve as canon fodder to maintain the dignity of the White House.
Madam Secretary has already been on similar junkets to the Middle East and the results are usually the same: The US government will forge ahead at all costs no matter what anybody else says.
But something quirky is happening on this trip that any conspiracy theorist (after all, I’m Arab) could sink his teeth into. On Sunday Ali Larijani, Iran’s top national security adviser and the country’s top nuclear negotiator, was scheduled to arrive in Saudi Arabia to also meet with King Abdullah.
I have no idea what Larijani plans to talk to the King about, but a good guess would be establish more friendly relations between the Kingdom and Iran.
So perhaps on the same day we have Condoleezza Rice and Ali Larijani just maybe in the same building, stating their respective cases to Saudi leaders.
So what’s that all about?
I can’t help but think that this may be a little awkward for not only the Saudi hosts, but for Ms. Rice and Mr. Larijani. Are they going to speak to each other? Will they bump into each other at the buffet and make small talk over mixed grill, rice and fruit drinks? Will Mr. Larijani try to soften Ms. Rice by inviting her to a Riyadh coffee shop for a bit of hubble-bubble to iron out their differences?
Imagine this scenario: Ms. Rice and Mr. Larijani sitting on a sofa in front of a low dining table in the darkened family section of a coffee shop. On the other side of the partition lurks American and Iranian security men eyeing each other with steely frowns.
Mr. Larijani orders apple Sheesha for the lady and strawberry for himself:
CONDI: There is no need to butter me up with Sheesha and cappuccino, Ali. We’re not even supposed to be talking to each other.
ALI: The world is going to hell in a hand basket and you’re worrying about what people will think?
C: The bottom line is that we will not stand for you having nuclear capabilities.
A: It’s for peaceful purposes. We want to be a world player, like you. And we don’t want to be dependent on oil forever, like you.
C: Pish-Posh. You plan to develop nuclear weapons. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but some day.
A: Well, for the sake of argument, say that we are. How can you blame us? You kill Muslims every day. Shouldn’t we take steps to protect ourselves.
C: Ali, Ali, Ali. We’re doing this for the greater good of the Middle East. We want to bring freedom and democracy to the region. These are just the birth pangs of democracy. It’s not always pretty, but worth it in the end.
A: Please, Condi, can you give birth someplace else. We’ve had enough of you trying to help us.
At this point, Ms. Rice gets a little woozy from the Sheesha and is whisked away to the safety of her hotel room. Mr. Larijani is left wondering whether he should have skipped the Sheesha and just ordered carrot cake.
The problem with this scenario is that the U.S. will not consider talks with Iran. This unfortunate position of the US will lead to further bloodshed. On this current path a full-blown regional sectarian war will erupt pitting Shiites and Sunnis against each other that will devour Muslims from North Africa to Afghanistan and perhaps beyond.
This silly nonsense of being in the same room together and not speaking, which pretty much occurred last year between the Iranians and the Americans at the United Nations, must stop if legitimate, long-lasting peace is to be expected in the Middle East.
Madam Secretary has already been on similar junkets to the Middle East and the results are usually the same: The US government will forge ahead at all costs no matter what anybody else says.
But something quirky is happening on this trip that any conspiracy theorist (after all, I’m Arab) could sink his teeth into. On Sunday Ali Larijani, Iran’s top national security adviser and the country’s top nuclear negotiator, was scheduled to arrive in Saudi Arabia to also meet with King Abdullah.
I have no idea what Larijani plans to talk to the King about, but a good guess would be establish more friendly relations between the Kingdom and Iran.
So perhaps on the same day we have Condoleezza Rice and Ali Larijani just maybe in the same building, stating their respective cases to Saudi leaders.
So what’s that all about?
I can’t help but think that this may be a little awkward for not only the Saudi hosts, but for Ms. Rice and Mr. Larijani. Are they going to speak to each other? Will they bump into each other at the buffet and make small talk over mixed grill, rice and fruit drinks? Will Mr. Larijani try to soften Ms. Rice by inviting her to a Riyadh coffee shop for a bit of hubble-bubble to iron out their differences?
Imagine this scenario: Ms. Rice and Mr. Larijani sitting on a sofa in front of a low dining table in the darkened family section of a coffee shop. On the other side of the partition lurks American and Iranian security men eyeing each other with steely frowns.
Mr. Larijani orders apple Sheesha for the lady and strawberry for himself:
CONDI: There is no need to butter me up with Sheesha and cappuccino, Ali. We’re not even supposed to be talking to each other.
ALI: The world is going to hell in a hand basket and you’re worrying about what people will think?
C: The bottom line is that we will not stand for you having nuclear capabilities.
A: It’s for peaceful purposes. We want to be a world player, like you. And we don’t want to be dependent on oil forever, like you.
C: Pish-Posh. You plan to develop nuclear weapons. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but some day.
A: Well, for the sake of argument, say that we are. How can you blame us? You kill Muslims every day. Shouldn’t we take steps to protect ourselves.
C: Ali, Ali, Ali. We’re doing this for the greater good of the Middle East. We want to bring freedom and democracy to the region. These are just the birth pangs of democracy. It’s not always pretty, but worth it in the end.
A: Please, Condi, can you give birth someplace else. We’ve had enough of you trying to help us.
At this point, Ms. Rice gets a little woozy from the Sheesha and is whisked away to the safety of her hotel room. Mr. Larijani is left wondering whether he should have skipped the Sheesha and just ordered carrot cake.
The problem with this scenario is that the U.S. will not consider talks with Iran. This unfortunate position of the US will lead to further bloodshed. On this current path a full-blown regional sectarian war will erupt pitting Shiites and Sunnis against each other that will devour Muslims from North Africa to Afghanistan and perhaps beyond.
This silly nonsense of being in the same room together and not speaking, which pretty much occurred last year between the Iranians and the Americans at the United Nations, must stop if legitimate, long-lasting peace is to be expected in the Middle East.
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